True Warriors

I was going to start this off by apologizing for making all of my latest posts about God...but I'm not sorry. He deserves the praise and the more I testify and talk about Him, the madder satan gets and the smaller he gets. I just love that :)

Any who...for a while now I have been fighting this odd feeling in the pit of my stomach. I could never find the words to describe it. Sometimes it felt like anxiety, sometimes it felt like restlessness...other times it felt like a hunger or desire for something...and it would result in my frustration of not being able to figure it out.

I would spend countless moments crying out to God to fill it or take it away, or even just show me what it was so I could pray about it....but it never came. 

To set some background here...this weekend I spent my time cooped up in the house trying to get over my cold. I didn't have much to do and I didn't really have anyone to talk to. All of a sudden, old fears, doubts, feelings and memories started flooding in that I had been delivered from...and I was so confused. I fought with satan all weekend knowing that I had been delivered but was confused as to why they were all back. 

This morning before service I sat in my chair praying. "God, I'm so tired of fighting this. I'm tired of being stuck in my old ways that I know I have been delivered from. I'm not willing to go back when I have come so far." 

I prayed for the service to be blessed. I prayed that the Lord would send me my own revival and to make me a dissenter based upon Him alone, not every one around me. 

Song service started and I worshiped Him with all of my heart. I was praying for the rapture haha

Anyways, Brother Richard Hyatt spoke today on being a true warrior and what true manliness and women-hood was....then all of a sudden...he started speaking the words I could never find to describe what I was feeling in the pit of my stomach and in my soul at the same time....

What he was talking about...being a true Godly warrior...being brought into real women-hood...that is what I have been craving. 

Finally Brother Rich used a word that just about took my breath away because it was so perfect....

desperate. 

That was it....that feeling in my soul was me being desperate for more of God. Desperate to be a true Godly woman and warrior. 

That anxiety left me at once. That hunger and desire was filled. My soul was no longer filled with frustration but excitement that God had spoken through a wonderful man of God directly to me. 

How incredible. My heart swells with emotion, praise, thankfulness, and love for God. Where would I be without Him? 

I could not live a day without my God leading me, speaking to me, sending me trials. Yes trials. Anything that takes away my pride, shows me more of God, and brings me closer to Him...yea I'll take it. 

I'm excited and determined to reach my spiritual goal and desire for God to bring me into true Godly woman-hood and to make me a Godly warrior for Him. *sigh*...I feel great. 

I know I have used this picture before but I just love it. 

I love worshiping my God. 

Sorry that this was such a long post...but you didn't have to read the whole thing if you didn't want to ;)

I have to give a special thank you to Brother Richard Hyatt for yielding himself to God. By doing that...God spoke to me in a very special way.

God bless friends. May God move in your life in a special way.